Celebrity Crush: Ben Schwartz

I feel like it’s my duty to keep you guys updated on how nice Ben Schwartz sounds, like in this interview with the AV Club.. I’d also like to reiterate that by “celebrity crush” I usually mean “celebrity I’d like to be friends with.” Listen to him describe his work ethic:

At the very beginning, I was a page at Letterman, and I freelanced for any place that would let me write any word. I wanted to do this so badly. Then when I got a tiny bit of success, I was petrified that I was going to lose it. I still feel it. House Of Lies finished filming, and I don’t know when I’m doing Parks again. The second that happened, I thought, “Fuck, I have to start writing. I have to keep myself working, because why else did I move to Los Angeles? If everyone else is working 9 to 5 every day, why shouldn’t I?” I wrote those postcard books, I’ll do short films for free, I like to keep myself creative. But there is an essence of “When does it end?” That drives me, and also gives me terrible stomach problems. The anxiety of not knowing what my next gig is keeps me hungry. I’m doing exactly what I’m doing, and I don’t want to fuck this up. There will be days where I’m not writing, but I’ll think back to when I was a page. I’d wake up at 6 in the morning, write monologue jokes as a freelance writer, go work the first page shift, sleep in the security office, work the second page shift so I could get some money, then I’d go take classes from 7 to 10 at UCB, then watch every show I could and take the last train home. I’d get four hours of sleep, and I did that for about two years. That guy would hate me if I took the day off today.

For Your Entertainment

One of my best gals just started a blog! Jayne is one of the funniest people I know and she’s a great writer. You will probably like her better than you like me, in which case I will be sad, but then I’ll understand. But then, after I understand, I’ll get really angry.
Go read Jayne’s blog!