Cat and Girl

Way back in my college days, my roomate (heeey, Liz!) bought me an autographed copy of the Cat and Girl book. I immediately fell in love with it and soon after that felt really dumb, because Cat and Girl is an internet comic that’s been around forever and I knew nothing about it. I will never be hip.

Cat and Girl is written/drawn by Dorothy Gambrell (read her interview with Bitch!) and it stars, as the title suggests, a cat (Cat) and a girl (Girl). If you like things like feminism, postmodernism, literature, technology, or pop culture, then you will like Cat and Girl. Basically if you like being smart and laughing, and I would hope you like both of those things, then you will like Cat and Girl. Cat and Girl mentions things like hipsters, The Golden Girls, and Richard Brautigan. This comic is one of my favorites because it perfectly captures how I feel about the orderliness of school lunches.

Dorothy Gambrell also writes/draws Donation Derby, which details how she spends the money she receives in donations. I’m barely being hyperbolic when I say that there’s nothing I care more about than what people buy at the grocery store, and this delivers. Check out Cat and Girl now so you won’t feel as painfully unhip as I do. I’m just trying to help you people out.

Donald Glover OR Childish Gambino OR I Don’t Know What to Think Anymore

I’m a warm-blooded human being, so of course I think Donald Glover is attractive. Let’s not kid ourselves.

He’s got a Miranda July level of productivity and creativity. It’s confusing because he’s so talented and so good looking; there is absolutely no reason he needs to be so good at both, because I’m pretty sure he could be successful on either the looks or talent alone. He’s like if Ryan Gosling was also great at stand up. Not fair and also unnecessary. Donald Glover hit it big with his group Derek Comedy’s Youtube videos, then he wrote for 30 Rock, then he quit to do stand up, then came Community, then came Childish Gambino, then came my deep confusion/attraction.

Childish Gambino makes for a complicated listening experience. This is his latest video, which is both great and creepy. It’s got a real An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge thing going on (oh, did you guys forget I majored in English? BOOM) while also dealing with a lot of other things too.

I’ll be honest. It’s hard for me to accept that the guy who raps lyrics like, “This Asian dude, I stole his girl, and now he got that Kogi beef / My dick is like an accent mark, it’s all about the over Es” is also the dude who looks like this:

He’s no Drake (no one is), but he’s close. CG reminds me of Lil Wayne, but with more highbrow references (Sufjan Stevens instead of Shenaynay, not that there is anything at all wrong with Shenaynay). NY Daily News recently published this article about Camp, his new album, which I’m really excited about. I love this quote from him, taken from an interview on a blog called Poop or Chocolate because, sure, that’s a great name.

Lately it’s been like I have a calling. I’ve always felt like the stuff that happened to me when I was a kid happened for a reason. And I’ve always felt like I had something to say and that what I’m doing is important. And I don’t let anything get in the way of that. If I really want to do something I can do it, and I’ve always felt that way. Never wavered from that. Lorne Michaels once said something to me that really stuck, and I’ve never seen it not be true. He said truly talented people are only faithful to their talent. Which might explain why he has people sign contracts for like seven years. Because if you’re really going after something, if you really have a goal, the only thing that’s gonna stop you is you. What I love about Kanye West is his willingness to be like “Fuck it. I’m gonna do it and I’ll deal with it later.” To take that leap. Because people who are real innovators; your Kanyes, your Michael Jordans, your Steve Martins, your Salvador Dalis, your Jim Hensons; nobody’s gonna tell them they’re too anything. Except for them. And since I have this unique perspective of having seen the world from all these opposing viewpoints, and I also happen to be creative, I feel like it’s my responsibility to expose the dichotomies that exist so there can be dialogue and understanding. I feel like that’s my calling. So what do I want? I want everything. Not because I’m greedy, but so I have all the tools to reach as many people as possible.

A Very Important Movie

Young Adult, the new Diablo Cody film starring Charlize Theron and Patton Oswalt, is coming out soon.
As you might imagine, that poster alone means I can’t wait to see it. Show me the trailer and I’m sold!

Charlize Theron stumbles around wearing yesterday’s eyeliner and sweatpants for most of this trailer, yet she still manages to look like an even prettier cross between Katherine Heigl and Sharon Stone. She’s going to end up with Patton Oswalt, right? I mean, she’d better. If I’m going to spend upwards of 8 dollars on this movie, she’d better end up with Patton Oswalt.
If you don’t like Diablo Cody, please look deep within yourself and examine where that hatred is coming from. Could it maybe be for the same reason you didn’t vote for Hilary Clinton, because there was “just something about her” you didn’t like? Is it, possibly, related to the fact that you don’t like Oprah, because you think she’s too full of herself? Listen, I would never accuse your pretty face of sexism, but it’s just something to think about. I wouldn’t want to sit through Juno again either, but let’s just be honest and admit that it had some sincerely affecting moments. Also, despite the fact that so much criticism is directed towards her, she has a great attitude and doesn’t talk shit about other people in interviews. Diablo Cody is creative, hardworking, and productive, so let’s get this on the record: I like her!

Christmas Jam: Last Christmas

Oh man, you guys. This week. I’ve been so busy I actually didn’t post anything yesterday. Not that I’m complaining; everything I’ve been doing has been fun and social, but let’s just say that someone we all know quite well fell asleep on the floor last night at 8:30. Spoiler alert: that someone was ME! As it turns out, my body doesn’t appreciate me giving it only 5 hours of sleep per night and then eating far too many fried pickles in a moment of fatigue-induced munchies. I got 8 hours of sleep, had a green smoothie, and I felt much better.
Until I saw Martha Marcy May Marlene, which we are not even going to talk about here. I am probably going to have nightmares. Instead, let’s focus on something that makes me happy: Christmas music!
Let me just say that if you are one of those people who complains about Christmas music being played too early, then get off of my lawn/blog. I seriously don’t understand your attitude, or the attitude of anyone who makes arbitrary rules about when it’s “okay” to do anything. Whatever. Eat pancakes for dinner, listen to Christmas music in July, see if I care! It’s your life. People who complain about others playing Christmas music remind me of people who are against gay marriage. Like, why do you care what other people are doing with their lives/iPods? Just stay out of shopping malls, which you should be doing anyway because malls are the worst, and you will rarely hear Christmas music. Let other people be happy and keep your attitude at home!
One of my all-time favorite songs just so happens to be a Christmas song, and I enjoy listening to it periodically year-round. Once the weather gets cold, though, I’m likely to bust it out multiple times per day. My favorite Christmas songs are the sad ones, and this fits the bill. It’s a delight. Listen to it to cheer yourself up, get in the Christmas spirit, or try to forget that cults are real and they will take over your life if you let them.

Lady Jam: Janis Ian, At Seventeen

This song comes on all the time on The Bridge, the soft rock Sirius station I somehow find myself listening to far too often. Somehow, Janis Ian makes a song about being an awkward teenager sound like the most tragic thing in the world. Which is, of course, why I like her. This song sounds so sad that I assumed it had to be about heartbreak; nope, it’s about acne, hating homecoming queens, and staying home on Friday nights. These are just some of lyrics:

I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear skinned smiles
Who married young and then retired
The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth.

Fun fact: according to Wikipedia, “on Valentine’s Day 1977, Ian received 461 Valentine cards, having indicated in the lyrics to ‘At Seventeen’ that she never received any as a teenager.” Homecoming queens, have you ever won a Grammy? Janis Ian has. Take that.