Posts Tagged: jason schwartzman

Celebrity Crush: Jason Schwartzman

jason schwartzman mustache

I first developed a crush on Jason Schwartzman when I saw him in Rushmore. When I rewatched it recently, I was surprised by how young he looked, and I kind of felt like a creep. But I was in high school when I originally saw it, so I guess it wasn’t all that weird that I had a crush on him.
jason schwartzman rushmore

I was totally onto something back then, because Jason Schwartzman turned into a full-fledged good-looking dude. But more than that, he’s a Celebrity Crush because he seems kind of awesome. For starters, he has great taste in ladies and lady-friends. Just look at him with our girl Zooey.
Chris Pizzello

And here he is with Kiki. You guys know how I feel about Kiki. She’s basically my favorite person in the world and I’m probably going to do a whole post on her someday. Anyway, you know a dude is solid when he has lots of girl friends, and Jason Schwartzman strikes me as that kind of dude. I mean, look at this:
jason schwartzman kikijason schwartzman kirsten dunst motorcycle

He was also in one of my Favorite Movies Ever (Even Though It Has Some Major Problems), Shopgirl. I love Shopgirl. I cried when I read the book, I cried when I watched the movie, and Claire Danes is at the top of her cryface game in this one. But more importantly, Jason Schwartzman is great in it. At first he’s not, and you’re going to be like, “Kerry, what are you talking about? This is the worst, not the best!” but you just need to hold out.
jason schwartzman claire danes

He was also killer in The Darjeeling Limited. I know it’s socially accepted to say you didn’t like The Darjeeling Limited, but you know what? I loved it. I have unconventional views on Wes Anderson movies, you guys. What are you going to do about it?
jason schwartzman darjeeling limited

He’s also on the cover of Bust this month. It’s a great interview and the whole issue’s stellar.
jason schwartzman bust magazine

Right now I’m sure you’re like, “I get it! Jason Schwartzman is great!” but you guys! There’s more! He also makes music as Coconut Records. I used to listen to the album Nighttiming at the beginning of my senior year of college when I drove home to visit my family, and now it always reminds of that long, boring, but strangely comforting drive.

Jason Schwartzman: in great movies, hangs out with great ladies, makes great music, sometimes has a great mustache. What’s not to like?

A Question


Do you guys ever think that dating Steve Martin would be like dating Steve Martin’s character in Shopgirl?


“Excuse me, Miss, would you like to be in an unequal, toxic relationship? I’LL TAKE ONE OF EVERYTHING!”-Steve Martin

“Can you see that? It’s the demise of your self-worth.”-Steve Martin

“I’m sad because I don’t know how to love :( “-Steve Martin

“Hold still while I strangle you. Metaphorically and, you know, literally.”-Steve Martin

For the record, I love Steve Martin. This movie made me cry (“Big surprise, bozo.”-You), and the book was really fantastic, too. He seems like he wouldn’t be a very good boyfriend, though. I mean, there’d be a lot of banjo, for starters.