Do you ever do something and think, “Oh my God, I’m just like my mom/dad”? I do all the time. Although I didn’t inherit my mom’s cleanliness (seriously, my place is always a mess), her perfectionism, or her aptitude for cake-decorating, I did get her obsessive need to feed people. H. and I always joke that when we go to my parents’ house, my mom is definitely going to make him a turkey-bacon sandwich, whether he’s hungry or not, and there will be at least one type of cookie in a tupperware container on the counter. That’s just how it is. Even if you’re a surprise guest, my mom always has something to feed you.
I guess that’s why I always feel bad when people come over and I don’t have any snacks for them. Our friends Mindy and Sam come over every week to watch Game of Thrones with H., and last week I worried that I didn’t have any snacks for them. This was dumb for a couple of reasons, firstly that they’re adults and they’re all perfectly capable of finding food, and secondly that no one even asked me for snacks! But still, I channeled my inner Mama W. and set to work making some Drunk Blondies, the baked good with the best name in the world. These are a good go-to cookie because they’re simple (they don’t even require a mixer!), they involve booze, and they will make you think of the LCD Soundsystem song Drunk Girls. Well, maybe they won’t make you think of it, but that’s what always happens to me.
This recipe comes from The Back in the Day Bakery Cookbook, which I highly recommend. Of course, I altered this recipe to make it dairy-free. If you aren’t baking for anyone with allergies (lucky duck), feel free to use butter and chocolate.
Dairy-Free Drunk Blondies
adapted from The Back in the Day Bakery Cookbook
2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon fine sea salt
1 cup Earth Balance, melted (I bet coconut oil would be really great, though)
2 cups packed light brown sugar
2 large eggs, at room temperature
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
2 tablespoons bourbon
1/2 cup sweetened flaked coconut, toasted
1/4 cup carob chips
Position a rack in the middle of the oven and preheat the oven to 350°F. Grease a 9-by-13-by-2-inch baking pan and line with parchment, allowing the ends of the paper to hang over two opposite edges of the pan.
In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, and salt; set aside.
Put the Earth Balance and brown sugar in a large mixing bowl and stir with a spoon until smooth. Add the eggs, vanilla, and bourbon, and mix until thoroughly combined. Stir in the flour mixture, followed by the pecans, coconut, and carob chips.
Put the batter into the prepared pan and smooth the top with an offset spatula. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes, until the top is golden brown. Remove the pan from the oven and let cool completely on a wire rack. Cut the blondies into bars.